Derek,
What you don't understand about Payola is that money is evil.
To get the point, take a dollar bill out of your pocket. Place it in front of you on your desk. Inspect it closely. Evil, right?
Now slowly turn it over and scrutinize the back. Aha! More evil.
Now carefully examine the edges, then smell it. Undeniable, vicious evil.
Ok, now comes the real epiphany. Spend it! Buy something--preferably frivolous.
You depraved, filthy, greedy low-life. You're tainted forever. Don't you care about people?
Best, Michael