I meant to post this sooner, but it took a while to get around to typing it all up. This may be the only time you'll ever see a police report posted on the Internet by the defendant in a criminal case, so I hope you feel special! 8) But I feel that I have little or nothing to lose by doing it. Perhaps it may lead to some good ideas or suggestions from the vast online conspiracy of sympathetic people potentially willing to help me beat this B.S. If nothing else, I think it's important for ordinary citizens to know as much as possible about how the police operate, and this sort of thing is usually hidden from public view.
Some notes about the document: Mainly it consists of two pairs of largely overlapping accounts by two different officers who were involved in my arrest -- first a "summary narrative" and a "narrative" by the officer in charge of the operation, and then a similar pair of reports by the main undercover female officer. It's kind of odd that they bother with "summary narratives" since they are almost the same as the full narratives. But of course this is typical of how bureaucracies work -- when things are normally done a certain way, you keep doing them that way even when it doesn't really make any sense.
There are a few things I've left out. I've excluded all the officers' names here because I'm not sure I'm legally allowed to disclose them. (When I got the report from the D.A.'s office I had to sign a release form, but they conveniently didn't give me a copy of it and I don't remember exactly what it said.) I've also left out my birth name where it occurs because I don't use it any more; if I'd wanted to keep using it, I wouldn't have had it changed! They had no reason to include it either, and the only reason I can see for it appearing over and over is their obvious cultural prejudice against the name "Starchild."
I've also added a few things in brackets -- explanatory notes, observations on what they got wrong, "sic" where there is a misspelling, etc.
FIRST REPORT (Summary Narrative by officer in charge)